Choosing a lifelong partner is pretty serious business. The divorce rate is at a whopping 50%, so making sure you and your partner are compatible for the long hall is pretty important. Choosing a partner is not as simple as choosing your outfit of the day – which can also be tough at times 😉 . Everyone has a different perspective on what commitment means to them and everyone looks for different things when looking for a partner, so I will be speaking from a personal point of view.
Do the tough get going?
A relationship can go through seasons of happiness and sometimes sadness – there are ups and downs in every relationship. Since nobody is perfect, there will always be hardships. A good partner will love and see you through the toughest times in your life. I am a true believer that loving others above yourself is the ultimate sign of commitment. Your match will do it for you and I hope you will want to do the same in return. As the saying goes – if you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best.
Do they bring out the best in you?
You can be completely in love with someone, but be they may not be a great match for you. Or, another person could check off all the boxes for you, but there could still be something missing. All relationships require support and growth. Ask yourself – Am I the best version of myself with them? Or do we bring out the worst in each other?
Have you communicated your expectations?
Everyone brings expectations into a relationship. We might be unaware of them and often times and when we find out our expectations aren’t being met we may feel selfish for having them and try to completely ignore them. However, just like a bad financial habit, they will be discovered. Here are some examples: Where do you see us in five years? Where are we going to live? What are your expectations on how to run a home?
Are they in constant pursuit of you?
Does your partner still put in the effort to make you feel special? Or do you? Often times, we put our best efforts before or at the beginning of the relationship and then it fades away. Slacking off in this category is unacceptable because when both parties don’t feel loved or valued it will lead to an unhappy ending. One small thing you can do is to try and leave your phone alone while we are on a date. Make the date be all about just the two of you – no distractions.
It is easier to love someone when you understand them.
Does your partner understand who you are and meet your needs? My partner knows me like the back of his hand. Having a person who can understand you on your best or worst days is crucial. Especially on the days where you don’t understand yourself.
If you are fortunate to meet someone with these qualities, they could just be the one for you. Take a moment to really think about who you choose to date – it’s harder than just picking out a pair of shoes 😉